I used to be a size 4. Now I’m not. The stereotypical woman gets pregnant and gets to eats whatever she wants. Not me. I have to watch my diet like a hawk, carefully counting carbs and sodium grams, even opting for fruit salad over birthday cake on my birthday.
Other women scale back their work-outs. Not me, I have to kick-up the walking routine. And still, I gain weight. A lot of weight.
Lots of women lose the weight almost instantly after giving birth. Yeah, not me. I have to fight tooth and nail for every single pound. I walk almost daily. We mostly eat organic food that we cook at home. Lots of produce. Trying to avoid processed foods, cut down on carbs. Still the weight just doesn’t come off.
For years I hated the size I had become, and saw it as temporary. So I would only buy the minimum amount of clothing. Purchasing the cheapest items, because “it was just for this season”. It was not uncommon for me to still have birthday money six months later, because “I was saving it until I lost weight”.
But this year I decided to go shopping. I bought some clothes in March. I bought some more in April. I bought more in May. I might even go again.
Because I am determined to love the size I am today.
It’s okay for me to buy clothes that fit me today. Clothes that I like. Clothes that fit well. Clothes that are colorful. Clothes that are me.
I may not be a size 4 anymore, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t be at peace with who I am today.
“Seek peace and pursue it” Psalm 34:14b