Posted in Full time Mom, Full time Job

Just For Me – A New Year’s Resolution

I stopped smoking eleven years ago! Eleven years, how did time go that fast? I smoked from age 17 to age 25, and during that time period, I came up with hundreds of plans and resolutions to stop smoking, and not one of them worked.

When I was 25, I started dating my husband. He was very athletic in high-school, he lettered in football, swimming and polo. He also played soccer and baseball. He lived and breathed sports. However, when he was in his early 20s, he got in a horrible car accident and narrowly escaped death. In the accident, his ankles were shattered, and he now has plates in both ankles. He isn’t supposed to put too much stress on his ankles, as it causes horrible pain. Two or three months after we started dating, he played soccer with a group of UCO friends. He had promised me he would take it easy, but he is very competitive, and he played hard! The next day I went over to his house and found him crawling, he could not walk. He had played through the pain the day before, but the next day it was too much. We made a deal, he would stop playing that hard, and I would quit smoking. And so I quit, after 8 years of trying, I quit. Not because I imagined myself with lung cancer or a wrinkled face, but because I pictured him crawling and in pain.

I did it for him, not for me.

When I am pregnant I get gestational diabetes. I eat exactly what and when the doctor tells me to eat. I watch my sugars like a hawk. One day some friends were over and we ordered pizza, but that was too many carbs for me, so I ate fish and brussels sprouts. Who in their right mind would eat brussels sprouts when there was pizza in the house?  In this last pregnancy I walked daily for six months, without missing once because it lowered my blood sugar.

I did it for my children, not for me.

Even in the little things, I had 2 hours before I needed to pickup my son. I wanted to go to the mall because I was in desperate need of clothes that fit me, and it was literally in the same parking lot as my doctor’s office. But I felt guilty, this was my day off, the day that I liked to spend extra time with my daughter. Why couldn’t I decide to just take 2 hours for me? For me! Why did I feel guilty with the idea of taking some time to leisurely shop, rather than run home like a crazy lady, get in my hour of “quality time” and then rush off again? Why couldn’t I just do something for me?

So I went to the mall, just for me.

This year I am going to make a resolution, to keep up my daily exercise habit.  Except this time I will do it for me, JUST FOR ME.  I feel better when I walk daily, the physical exercise gives me energy, helps me focus, it gives me time to think and make decisions.  So here’s to a resolution made for me.

JUST FOR ME.

What resolution will you make JUST FOR YOU and no one else?

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